Catholic Commentary
Barzillai's Loyal Farewell and the Gift of Chimham (Part 2)
39All the people went over the Jordan, and the king went over. Then the king kissed Barzillai and blessed him; and he returned to his own place.
The true measure of a king lies not in who bows before him, but in whom he honors and releases—and Barzillai's greatness lies in knowing when to return home.
As David recrosses the Jordan to reclaim his throne, he publicly honors Barzillai — the aged Gileadite who provisioned him in exile — with a royal kiss and blessing before releasing him to return home. This farewell scene crystallizes themes of faithful service rewarded, the sanctity of old age, and a holy detachment from earthly preferment. Barzillai's choice to return to his own place rather than follow the king to court becomes a quiet model of integrity and freedom of spirit.
The crossing of the Jordan and the public farewell (v. 39a–b)
The verse opens with a deliberate note of completeness: "all the people went over the Jordan, and the king went over." The repetition is not redundant — it frames what follows as a public act. David's kiss and blessing of Barzillai occur before the assembled people, the very crowd that had accompanied him on both legs of this painful journey of exile and restoration. The crossing of the Jordan is itself charged with meaning in the Hebrew imagination, evoking the border between exile and inheritance, wilderness and promise (cf. Joshua 3). That David's first notable act after the crossing is not a military gesture or a political proclamation, but a personal act of gratitude toward an old man, speaks volumes about the moral character the narrative is reconstructing for the restored king.
The kiss of the king (v. 39b)
"The king kissed Barzillai" — this is a formal gesture of royal honor, not merely private affection. The kiss in the ancient Near East carried covenantal weight; it sealed relationships, ratified loyalties, and publicly declared regard. David had invited Barzillai to Jerusalem (vv. 33–34), and Barzillai had declined — citing his advanced age (eighty years), his diminished senses, and his desire to die near the graves of his parents (vv. 34–37). The king's kiss at parting acknowledges that Barzillai's choice, rather than being a rejection of royal favor, is itself honorable. The king does not demean or dismiss the old man's preference; he blesses it.
The royal blessing (v. 39b)
That the king "blessed him" is remarkable: in Israel, the lesser is normally blessed by the greater, but the categories are quietly complicated here. Barzillai had, in a very real sense, sustained the king's life during Absalom's rebellion (2 Sam 17:27–29). There is a suggestion in the blessing that David is not conferring favor downward but returning something owed. The Hebrew root bārāk (to bless) in its royal-judicial sense implies a declaration of divine favor, a pronouncement that Barzillai's life and choices have been righteous. The Church Fathers noticed that blessings in Scripture often function as prophetic utterances: what the king declares, God ratifies.
"He returned to his own place" (v. 39c)
The final phrase carries the weight of the entire episode. Barzillai does not cling to the king, does not leverage his moment of grace into a platform for advancement. He returns to his own place — his land, his kin, his graves. This is not resignation or defeat; it is the dignity of a man who knows who he is, what he needs, and what he does not need. Earlier in the exchange (v. 38), David had transferred Barzillai's gift to his servant Chimham, presumably Barzillai's son (cf. 1 Kgs 2:7) — a proxy through whom the old man's generosity continues to bear fruit in the next generation. Barzillai departs having given everything and received honor; he leaves the stage without grasping.
Catholic tradition brings several distinctive lenses to bear on this quietly powerful verse.
The theology of aging and holy detachment. Barzillai is eighty years old, and his earlier speech (vv. 34–37) is one of Scripture's most honest meditations on old age — he cannot taste food, cannot hear singing, and does not want to be a burden to the king. Rather than treating this as tragedy, the narrative presents it as wisdom. The Catechism of the Catholic Church (§2218) notes that children and society owe honor to those who have given life, and that the elderly deserve reverence, patience, and gratitude. Pope Francis, in Amoris Laetitia (§191), calls the relationship between generations a "treasure" and warns against treating the elderly as burdensome. Barzillai embodies what the tradition calls contemptus mundi — not hatred of the world but freedom from its seductions — made possible only by a life of fidelity.
The sacramental resonance of the kiss and blessing. St. Augustine, in his Tractates on John, treats the kiss as a sign of peace and mutual recognition in charity. The royal blessing, meanwhile, participates in what the Church calls the munus regale — the kingly office that blesses, protects, and affirms the dignity of those it serves. This reflects CCC §786, which teaches that the baptized share in Christ's kingly dignity, a dignity exercised not through domination but through service and self-gift.
Fidelity in obscurity rewarded publicly. St. Thomas Aquinas (ST II-II, q. 106) treats gratitude as a moral virtue — the just rendering of honor for benefits received. David's public kiss and blessing exemplify this virtue. Barzillai had served in obscurity during David's darkest hour; the king now honors him before all Israel. This mirrors the Gospel promise that fidelity in hidden things will be proclaimed openly (Matt 10:26; Luke 12:3).
Barzillai's farewell speaks directly to two temptations common in contemporary Catholic life: the temptation to demand recognition for our service, and — its twin — the temptation to keep grasping for influence long past the moment when we are called to step back.
Concretely: many Catholics serve in parishes, ministries, schools, and families for decades, often without acknowledgment. Barzillai's example counsels serving faithfully without measuring the debt owed. But the scene equally challenges those who cannot relinquish roles, positions, or platforms even when age, health, or the needs of the community call for transition. Barzillai's greatness lies precisely in knowing when to return to his own place — to let Chimham go forward in his name, to allow the next generation its moment.
For those caring for elderly parents or parishioners, this verse offers a scriptural warrant for the dignity of the aged who choose dependence on home and family over the glamour of the court. For leaders and pastors, it is a quiet rebuke of clericalism and careerism alike. Ask: am I serving for the mission, or for the proximity to the king?
Typological and spiritual senses
On the allegorical level, patristic reading consistently identified David's restoration across the Jordan with Christ's resurrection and return to glory. In this reading, Barzillai — who provides bread (lehem) and sustenance in the wilderness of exile — foreshadows those who nourish Christ in his members during times of suffering (Matt 25:35). The king's kiss of blessing in return echoes the Father's embrace of the returning son (Luke 15:20). The figure of Barzillai who serves humbly, refuses honor for himself, and sends his son in his place has also been read as a figure of the Old Covenant priesthood, faithful to the end, ceding its mediating role to the generation of the New.