Catholic Commentary
The Quarrelsome Woman: An Unstoppable Irritant
15A continual dropping on a rainy day and a contentious wife are alike:16restraining her is like restraining the wind, or like grasping oil in his right hand.
Proverbs 27:15–16 compares a quarrelsome person to the relentless irritation of a dripping roof on a rainy day, emphasizing that such contention cannot be restrained or suppressed any more than one can control the wind. The passage illustrates how chronic verbal discord erodes household peace through persistent, inescapable friction rather than dramatic conflict.
Quarrelsomeness doesn't destroy a home through crisis—it erodes it through endless, inescapable repetition, like water dripping on a rainy day, until it becomes impossible to contain.
Literally, the sage counsels prudence in the choice of a spouse and the governance of a household — a thoroughly practical concern throughout Proverbs 10–31. The "wise woman" who builds her house (Prov 14:1) stands in sharp contrast to this figure who dismantles it not with dramatic betrayal but with perpetual friction.
Spiritually, the passage opens onto the tradition's teaching on the tongue and on charity in speech (cf. Sirach 28). If the dripping water erodes stone, chronic verbal discord erodes the bonds of communion that God intends for human community. The Fathers read this passage in light of the broader Wisdom literature's concern with shalom — the peace that is not mere silence but an ordered, life-giving harmony in relationship.
Catholic tradition reads these verses within the fuller architecture of biblical Wisdom literature, understanding them not merely as domestic prudence but as a reflection on the disorder sin introduces into God's design for human community. The Catechism teaches that "sins against truth… are committed by those who by their remarks injure the reputation of others" (CCC 2477), and that "the right to the communication of the truth is not unconditional" (CCC 2488). Chronic quarrelsomeness is precisely a failure of this ordered communication.
St. John Chrysostom, preaching on the Epistles, repeatedly invokes the imagery of Proverbs to warn that a divided household is a house whose prayers are hindered (cf. 1 Pet 3:7). St. Augustine, in De Doctrina Christiana, links disordered speech to concupiscence of the tongue — the will turned inward upon itself, using words not to build up (oikodome) but to assert, wound, and dominate.
St. Thomas Aquinas (Summa Theologiae II-II, q. 37) identifies discord as a sin against charity: "Discord is opposed to the unanimity and peace which charity establishes." The uncontainable quality of the quarrelsome person in these verses illustrates precisely what Thomas means: once the will has been disordered toward contention, it moves with the autonomy of natural forces, resisting the governance of reason and virtue.
Pope Francis, in Amoris Laetitia §104, drawing on 1 Corinthians 13, warns against the "violence in the home" wrought by "harsh words" and the erosion of domestic peace, echoing the ancient Wisdom tradition's alarm at exactly this kind of unceasing, low-grade antagonism. The passage thus speaks not to misogyny but to the universal call to peace-making at the heart of the Beatitudes (Mt 5:9).
These verses offer a precise diagnosis — and a quiet warning — for any contemporary Catholic willing to receive it honestly. The "dripping roof" is not dramatic. It is the sarcastic aside at dinner, the relitigated grievance, the criticism dressed as concern. Most households are not destroyed by crisis; they are eroded by accumulation.
For Catholic spouses, these verses are an examination of conscience: Am I the dripping rain in my home? Do my words build up (cf. Eph 4:29) or wear down? The image of wind that cannot be restrained warns that once a pattern of contentiousness takes hold, it becomes near-impossible for others to address — a call, therefore, to act before the habit solidifies.
For those on the receiving end of a chronically quarrelsome relationship, the passage also offers realism: the sage does not prescribe a solution. Sometimes wisdom names a problem without promising an easy remedy, and that very honesty is pastorally valuable. Bring it to prayer; seek counsel; do not pretend the rain will stop by ignoring it.
In parish and community life, the passage invites Catholics to audit the culture of their small groups, councils, and families: Is our speech ordered toward shalom, or have we grown comfortable with friction?
Commentary
Proverbs 27:15 — "A continual dropping on a rainy day"
The Hebrew underlying this image (delet — a dripping, matar — rain) evokes not a thunderstorm but the maddening monotony of a leaking roof on a grey, overcast day: water that falls not in violence but in ceaseless, unavoidable repetition. The comparison is deliberately bathetic. Quarrelsomeness is not presented here as dramatic evil — not murder or adultery — but as something far more insidious: a grinding, low-level torment that wears down the soul through sheer persistence. The word translated "continual" (tarid, from a root meaning "to drive out" or "to pursue") carries the connotation of something that chases its victim, unable to be escaped. One cannot argue with rain; one cannot negotiate with a dripping roof. The figure captures the peculiar powerlessness of living with chronic contention: reason is useless against it.
This verse completes a couplet begun in Proverbs 27:15a (the full MT verse reads: "A continual dripping on a rainy day / and a contentious woman are alike"), and so the simile structurally equates the irritant with the person: the woman is not like the dripping — she is the dripping. The sage chooses an image from architecture rather than from nature's grandeur, deliberately placing the lesson in the ordinary, enclosed world of household life.
Proverbs 27:16 — "Restraining her is like restraining the wind"
Verse 16 intensifies the helplessness implied in v. 15. The Hebrew tsapan (to hide, restrain, or store up) is used elsewhere of hiding treasure or concealing secrets; its use here is ironic — one might successfully conceal precious things, but to "conceal" (i.e., suppress) the wind is absurd. The wind (ruach) in Hebrew thought is associated with divine power, unpredictable freedom, and the Spirit of God. To invoke ruach is therefore to place human contention in the same register as forces no mortal hand can govern.
The verse may carry a second image in its Hebrew original: some manuscripts and versions suggest the phrase about "anointing oil in the right hand" that follows (v. 16b in the Masoretic text), implying that just as oil inevitably runs through the fingers, so the contentious woman cannot be contained. The Septuagint and Vulgate preserve a slightly different reading, but in both, the core comparison stands: this is a force that exceeds human management.
Literal and Spiritual Senses